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  • Writer's pictureC.A. Lightfoot

Such disappointment


I haven't written a damn thing in weeks. Its a combination of problems. I've been a 5 am writer for the last couple of years, but with my new work schedule, that is practically impossible. I have tried writing at night and had some success, but with my family crammed into our RV still, finding time and quiet is almost impossible.

I try to be the impossible, like most working mothers out there. I need to care for my family as though I have no career, and work my shifts as though I have no family to care for. Some people don't also have a dream they want to pursue on top of all that, but here I am.

I love taking care of the family, they're amazing. I love my job, working with kiddos is such a privilege.

But I want to reach MY goals. I want to do things that are for me. The main thing I want to do more than anything is finish and publish books.

So, why can't I seem to finish this thing? I need time, which is hard to come by at the moment. Part of me wants to give up on Dark Ember, work on something else. But that' the thinking that made finishing Guardian take 7 years.

I'm so close. So very close. I don't want to give up, even if its taking me so long. If I can finish this thing by November, I'll have done a first draft in under a year. That's not so bad, even if its not even close to the goals I had for this year.

Lets face it, this year had been a dumpster fire.

I'm trying to get back into the saddle, especially since my blood pressure seems to be settling, finally.

Back to updating more often. Be on the look out for more excerpts this week and a sneak peek at a new short story!


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